Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Farewell.

There comes a time when all things end. It's the natural order of all things to cease. However, as many times as it happens, it never makes the process any easier. This will be my last post on this blog. It's time to say goodbye.

I feel that it has run its course. I don't know why I originally started writing in here, but I know where the bulk of the material has come from. It started as therapy, as poetry, and became my own little secret spot to sling barbs and arrows out and around in a vague manner, or say the things that I didn't have the courage to tell people in person.

In short, it turned from being helpful outlet to a hermit's nest.

I won't say that I'm completely healed. The last two and a half years have been a long road, and for a long time, much of it led downward. I tried to crawl out, and a few times, I thought the clouds were gone, that everything was clear; The truth of the matter is that these things don't go away easily.

I've doubted myself so much. I still do, on a lot of levels. But I'm beginning to feel that this road is actually turning a corner, finally.

You have to do it on your own, or at least, I did. I recommend it highly. If you use other moments, other people, other situations as a crutch, the bone will never mend properly. My heart still gets heavy from time to time, but it has less and less to do with Her. I have to define and address this malaise on my own, and figure out the key to working past it. These are my problems, and problems I have with myself.

This space, however, will no longer be the place that I go to anymore. It has an identity that I don't wish to shoulder anymore. Don't worry, I'm still writing. I'll still be blogging, too. But it won't be this. Not anymore. I'm over it.

We had some great times, but here's where this ends. For anyone who cares to continue reading beyond this, I have 2 new blogs set up, one for fiction that I'm working on, Braindrops, and the other as my sort of sketch-pad for life, Self Sagax. I hope to update at least one of them once a week.

I'll miss this place, but its time has come. It's always hard to say goodbye to a good friend, so I won't. All I'll say is...

Thanks.